In everyone's life there must be a balance. The good and the evil, the light and the dark, the positive and the negative. For too long we all have tried to hide our darker selves away, trying to be good for the sake of society. I am guilty of this too. I tried for many years to be good, to be the poster child of a good daughter, doing what I was told, and burying all my 'bad' emotions inside.
I've decided to stop that. I no longer wish to have this nagging feeling in my soul, like something's missing, and its been eating away at me. Now I find myself with this huge gap there that I cannot fill with the normal 'happiness, sunshine, and rainbows'. I feel the only course of action is to finally embrace my darker half and to gain some balance in my life.
I know it will be a hard journey, I will see things about myself that will make me want to turn my head in disgust. But I must embrace these parts of me in order to become whole. I know surely that if I do not I am going to kill whatever good is left in me and all that will be left is the husk of a human being.
I would rather die then allow this to happen.
I will keep you posted of my progress.